That is why I cannot let it end this way. I love you and if I have caused you everlasting pain I want to know how to help you ease it. I have thought, felt, and talked of suicide in front of you. I will not blame you for the anger and frustration I cause you to blow up at people when they say or do things that make me angry.
That is why I cannot let it end this way. I grew up in a violent home and when I had you I was determined things would be different for you.
I will take care of you and love and help you see that the little child in you was only doing what she thought she could do to protect herself. I will affirm you with thoughts of love only. I am changing for you and I hope you can find it your heart to forgive me.
The worst part is knowing it is my own fault because I didn't listen to you and give you the space you needed. I have put you down in front of friends, family and while alone, and when you felt hurt, I told you that I was only kidding or joking, and that you are too sensitive.
I never really did before. It's hurting me so much to know I have ruined it with you.
That would be an icky place to have had to look. I should have said something when you turned to walk away. I was hurting the both of you.
Posted by: Arashijora | on October 2, 2012
These type of situations might last for weeks or even a few months. For the mistakes I have made, I am learning the hard way. I do know what I did was wrong and childish.
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