This is easier in the short term than looking within and dealing with emotions. Each person can have their individual sense of self and yet remain emotionally connected when there is disagreement or conflict. How Do Co-dependent People Behave? Today, however, the term has broadened to describe any co-dependent person from any dysfunctional family.
The worst part is when we do not realize what is going on and continue to live in a loveless partnership because we have never learned what a good partnership looks like. The co-dependent person typically sacrifices his or her needs to take care of a person who is sick. Metaphorically, we take it for them and carry it.
They try to take care of a person who is experiencing difficulty, but the caretaking becomes compulsive and defeating. Doing things that we do not want to do not only wastes our time and energy, but it also brings on resentments. Saying things that we do not mean only hurts us, because we then are living a lie. Acting responsibly as a parent is part of what it means to love our children.
Others may develop compulsive behaviors like workaholism, gambling, or indiscriminate sexual activity. Be honest in your communication and in expressing your needs and desires. We will drive our children around to activities when we are tired or would rather be doing something else. However, when we always put the other first in our adult relationships, at the expense of our own health or well-being, we may be codependent.
If you love your partner and want to keep the relationship, you need to heal yourself first and foremost. You tend to love people that you can pity and rescue. They can point out codependent tendencies and actions between the two of you that you may not be aware of. Your partner is constantly taking advantage of your good qualities.
Each person can have their individual sense of self and yet remain emotionally connected when there is disagreement or conflict. Co-dependency often affects a spouse, a parent, sibling, friend, or co-worker of a person afflicted with alcohol or drug dependence.
Posted by: Mura | on October 2, 2012
Burn , author of Unhealthy Helping: Change cannot happen if we do not change.
Burn , author of Unhealthy Helping: We will drive our children around to activities when we are tired or would rather be doing something else. A codependent relationship , by contrast, is one-sided.
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